drawing of ferret same drawing same drawing

Ferret Math


What does ferret math means in your household?
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Our Household | Connie Pallai's Household | Vanessa's Household | Carrie Duc-Vegso's Household


Ferret math in the Rob Alexander house means on a daily basis.

How many times "Diesel" climbs our speakers?
How many squeeky toys Diesel deatroys daily?
How many times "Sidney" drags Diesel around the house by his tail?
How often they both attack the dog daily?
How loud does Diesel squeel when you put him in the bath?
How many times does Sidney want to lick your face off?
How many times do you have to fish Sidney and Diesel out of the fridge?


Ferret Math in Our Household Means:

I will not tell you now about the usual ferret math: i.e. how our gang numbers fluctuated from 1 to 2 to 4 to 3 (Dynamo died in December 1994) to 4 to 6 to 8 ferrets (excluding the ferrets we fostered for a short time...). I will write about it one of those days... LT
Order of arrival:
Dynamo: 1st
Pépée La Pew: 2nd
Mukluk & Sanka: 3rd
Presto: 4th
Boum Boum & Snoreau: 5th
Piccolo & Qannik: 6th
Favorite places to snooze:
Boum Boum: 13 (he is our "bon vivant")
Pépée La Pew: 8
Presto: 7
Piccolo: 6
Qannik: 5
Sanka: 5
Mukluk: 4
Snoreau: 3
Number of times our ferrets visited Marc's parents:
Pépée & Presto: everytime we visit.
Boum Boum: 1. We were told not to bring him back...
Snoreau: 1 visit + 1 bite = 0 future visits.
Mukluk & Sanka: 0. We are not crazy.
Piccolo & Qannik: a few times
Number of litter boxes & newspaper locations:
Too many for Lorraine's taste.
Number of minutes it took Marc to decide to adopt Boum Boum & Snoreau (which we were supposed to foster):
Less than 30.
Number of times the ferrets want to be let out in the hallway:
Every time we get near the door or pick up our keys.
Number of times Marc shares his breakfeast with the ferrets:
Everytime a ferret is begging or jumping on him.
Number of ferrets Lorraine tried to turn into lap ferrets:
4 with 75% failure rate.
Number of ferrets sometime snoozing on the bed with Marc:
1 to 3.
Number of holes digged on the campus behind our apartment:
By Dynamo: 7.
By other ferrets: 3.
Number of days we tried to train Pépée to stop scratching the rug to be switched to the other side:
I do not recall. Pépée won for a while: she trained us almost perfectly since our response rate used to be about 95%. We discontinued doing it: too many ferrets to shuffle on the other side of the appartment.
Number of days we tried to train Boum Boum to stop scratching near the entrance door:
Too many. We gave up and decided that the following arrangement is very decorative: our door is surrounded by plastic runner and corrugated plastic taped on the rug. Boum Boum is deaf and concentrates 100% on scratching.
Number of times a ferret slipped out of the harness:
Too often. Lorraine almost lost her cool while being bitten by Mukluk while attempting to put the harness back on outdoor.
Number of escapes since 1993:
Pépée once slipped out unnoticed, wandered in the hallway and had a great time playing in a neighbour's apartment.
Mukluk once got access to the balcony. Fortunately she only digged the flowers pots and did not fall 8 storeys down. Lorraine almost had 1 heart attack.
Snoreau slipped out of the harness while digging in one of Dynamo's holes. Fortunately, Lorraine grabbed him when he exited at the other end. Lorraine almost had another heart attack.
Snoreau once slipped out unnoticed, probably wandered in the hallway and got into the elevator. Fortunately, there were neighbours from our floor in the elevator whom brought it back to us. It is a good thing to let people know you own ferrets... Lorraine, not having noticed that Snoreau was gone, did hot have a heart attack.
Number of times Dynamo almost gave Lorraine a heart attack:
2. Her leash got tangled once in the tall grass on the other side of a tall fence. Another time, she wanted to investigate one of her holes after hearing a roaring sound. Lorraine was relieved to find out that this sound was produced by a groundhog.
Number of heart attacks suffered by Lorraine:
0. She however gained a lot of grey hairs since owning ferrets but also lots of laugh lines.
Marc too.


Ferret Math in the Carrie Duc-Vegso's (of Quebec) Household Means:

October 1998

How many times an evening do I have to take Vixen off of my husband's desk?
How many times has Vixen typed, by walking over the keyboard while my husband's computer was on?
How many times has Slinky tried to jump off of a shoulder while outside?
How many times has Chewy jumped off of our bed and landed smack on his face?
How many times has Shawnee seemed to be dead or comatose?
How many times has Chewy looked really surprised when accidently hopping right off the side of the bed?
How many times has Shawnee had to chastise Chewy?
How many times has Slinky hissed at Vixen?


Ferret Math in the Connie Pallai's Household Means:

No. of harnesses that can hold Buddy:
No. of times Judge (our Greyhound) got bit by Buddy:
Every time: we have to lock our dog up when we let the ferret get the run of the house because Buddy runs right for Judge's legs and bites him!
No. of time our Siamese Cat, Penny, got bit by Buddy and came back for more:
101+ (but she loves him so much)
No. of times Buddy uses the litter box:
0 - his
3 - the cat's. Buddy wouldn't use a litter box in his cage but when he's out he'll use the cat's box. He's only used it three times now but normally it's off-limits to him and these three times he's gotten past the barriers (imagine that!).
No. of times Buddy sneaks out of his cage when a feeding/cleaning is happening:
No. of times we decided he was pretty darn cute:
1001 (stopped counting)


Ferret Math in Vanessa's (from Alberta) Household Means:

No. of times Beau has scared somebody (after only 3 weeks!)
No. of socks Beau has eaten
3 (one per week)
No. of grapes Beau would eat in a row (if allowed)
at least 4
No. of long trips already taken in Beau's short life
No. of kisses Beau gives his mom every night before bed
a total of 5
No. of times Beau's mom repeats his cute escapades in a row (to the same person!)
a minimum of 10
Amount of trouble Beau can get up to in an hour
more than a set of two year old twins can in a year!
No. of hearts Beau has won since coming to live with me
not less than 30, counting dogs, cats, and humans!
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Updated 1999.11.03
visits since 1997.01.26
Copyright © 1999 Lorraine Tremblay